Guest “Ron White impression” by David Middleton

Published on Monday, September 09, 2019 by Common Dreams

‘People Power Is Winning’: Fossil Fuel Divestment Movement Celebrates $11 Trillion Milestone
“We would not have smashed our divestment targets without the thousands of local groups who have pressured their representatives to pull out of fossil fuels.”

by Jessica Corbett, staff writer

Ahead of an historic summit in Cape Town this week and the global climate strike planned for Sept. 20, the environmental group 350.org announced Monday that the international movement demanding divestment from fossil fuels and investment in clean energy had secured commitments from more than 1,110 institutions with over $11 trillion in assets.

[…]

Common Dreams

Are these people so stupid that they actually think they’ve eliminated $11 trillion worth of fossil fuel assets? Even if all of the “1,110 institutions with over $11 trillion in assets” actually divested a significant volume of fossil fuel companies’ stock, they could only do so if there were investors willing to purchase that stock.

Why would they even think that “1,110 institutions with over $11 trillion in assets” is significant? That’s an average of about $10 billion per institution. As of August 2018, just the two largest institutions, BlackRock and Vanguard, had $11.4 trillion worth of assets under management (AUM). The top nine investment firms had $28.34 trillion worth of AUM, averaving over $3 trillion each. None of these firms have even expressed an interest in joining the “Fossil-Free” movement. Yes, these idiots are so fracking stupid that they call it “fossil-free.”

“We’re divesting because fossil fuels, like coal, oil and gas, are toxic to our planet and everyone who shares this common home.” ✊
The #FossilFree movement blasted through another big milestone this week. Find out more: https://t.co/WLYOrxTKW3 #FinancingTheFuture pic.twitter.com/X7ot35N024

— 350 dot org (@350) September 9, 2019

350 dot org and the #FossilFree movement are clearly in Ron White country.

While you really can’t fix stupid, you can edit it out…

The world’s richest institutions invest in fossil fuels. […Really futile and stupid gesture snipped…].
Divestment is one of the fastest-growing movements in the fight against climate change. It’s only getting started.

By Umair Irfan Updated May 15, 2019

[…Really futile and stupid gesture snipped…]

There’s still money to be made in fossil fuels

[…Really futile and stupid gesture snipped…]

Clearly, there remains a large and growing market for fossil fuels. They remain vital for the global economy and a critical raw material for products like plastics. Much of the technological progress humanity has made to date can be traced to cheap, abundant resources like coal, oil, and natural gas. Our current trajectory has us consuming even more.
“The day after, if we were to divest, we’re still going to turn on the lights,” said Harvard President Lawrence Bacow at a forum on fossil fuel divestment. “We would still be dependent on fossil fuels.”

But Harvard and similar institutions have argued that it’s not about the money. Rather, they argue that divesting from fossil fuels would politicize their portfolios, and they have better ways to fight climate change.

“The University’s position, as it has stated previously, is that it should not use the endowment to achieve political ends, or particular policy ends,” wrote a Harvard spokesman in an email. “Harvard is committed to influencing public policy on climate change through scholarship and research.”

[…Really futile and stupid gesture snipped…]

Yale University, which sits on a mountain of money $29.4 billion tall, didn’t respond to a request for comment. However, David Swensen, the school’s chief investment officer, said last year he doesn’t support fully divesting from fossil fuels on moral grounds.

“If we stopped producing fossil fuels today we would all die. We wouldn’t have food. We wouldn’t have transportation. We wouldn’t have heat. We wouldn’t have air conditioning. We wouldn’t have clothes,” he said. “It’s very nice to protest the fact that we have fossil fuel producers in the portfolio, but the real problem is the consumption, and every one of us in the room is a consumer. I guess it’s a little bit harder to look in the mirror and say ‘I’m part of the problem’ as opposed to pointing the finger.”

[…Really futile and stupid gesture snipped…]

Divestment isn’t moving the needle — yet — but it’s changing the conversation
Despite gains in divestment, global greenhouse gas emissions continue to rise. Some fossil fuel companies are indeed struggling, particularly coal mining firms. But others are still making tons of money. Exxon Mobil generated $279 billion in revenue in 2018. Shell made $388.4 billion. BP made $303.7 billion. Aramco made $355.9 billion.

Analysts agree that the $8 trillion that’s been divested or pledged to withdraw to date from fossil fuels is still a small slice of the overall share of the $100 trillion-plus global capital market. “At present, [divestment] has had a pretty minimal impact on the industry,” said Richard Taylor, an oil and gas industry analyst at Fitch Solutions.

[…Really futile and stupid gesture…]

Still, the overall market impacts are minimal because the amount of money floating around right now is so vast and the inertia is immense. “They aren’t changing their behavior, that’s for sure,” said John Thieroff at Moody’s Investors Service. “Like it or not, we’re going to continue to consume oil and gas for while. There’s no switch that’s going to get flipped in the next year or two that’s going to let us walk away from oil.”

[…Wailing and teeth gnashing snipped…]

Vox

Really, the only passages of the Vox article that made any sense at all were these two quotes…

“The day after, if we were to divest, we’re still going to turn on the lights. We would still be dependent on fossil fuels.”

Harvard President Lawrence Bacow

“If we stopped producing fossil fuels today we would all die. We wouldn’t have food. We wouldn’t have transportation. We wouldn’t have heat. We wouldn’t have air conditioning. We wouldn’t have clothes,” he said. “It’s very nice to protest the fact that we have fossil fuel producers in the portfolio, but the real problem is the consumption, and every one of us in the room is a consumer.”

David Swensen, Yale University chief investment office

It is a fossil fueled world…

And fossil fuel divestment is “a really futile and stupid gesture”…

Bluto (John Belushi): What the **** happened to the Greentards I used to know? Where’s the spirit? Where’s the guts, huh? This could be the greatest night of our lives, but you’re gonna let it be the worst! “Ooh, we’re afraid to go with you Bluto, we might get in trouble.” Well, just kiss my @$$ from now on! Not me! I’m not gonna take this! ExxonMobil, dead! Chevron, dead! Shell—
Otter (Tim Matheson): Dead! Bluto’s right. Psychotic, but absolutely right. We gotta take these bastards. Now we could do it with conventional weapons, but that could take years and cost millions of lives. No, I think we have to go all out. I think that this situation absolutely requires a really futile and stupid gesture be done on somebody’s part.
Bluto: And we’re just the guys to do it.

Paraphrased from National Lampoon’s Animal House (1978)